What did you do with those feelings of regret?
Karyn: Slowly, the spirit of discouragement and despair began to slink into my heart like a dark shadow. I began to wonder if I would ever “come to” again. Nearly three months passed and finally I ordered a book online, “Change Your Brain; Change Life” by Dr. Daniel Amen, M.D.
The book remained closed on my dresser until the morning I woke up and picked up the book. I looked at my husband and announced before reading a single word from it, “I know that my brain will believe and act out whatever I tell it. From now on, I am going to tell my brain how resilient it is and that I am going to be better than ever!”
From that moment on, I felt a sense of renewed hope and optimism. I made a choice in that moment to choose “resiliency” over “regret”.
Carol: and it has been quite evident that you did and have! Was there anything else that helped prompt that insight/that feeling?
Karyn: I remembered the words my oldest daughter had told me after I had gone through a divorce years before, “Mom, the thing I love most about you is how resilient you are! You never let anything get you down! At least, not for long!”
Her former words, rehearsed once more into my mind became the vote of encouragement and assurance that I needed to overcome all the regret and remorse I had been feeling about my choice to innocently sit down on that country swing that beautiful summer day in June. I had to assure myself that if I would have known better, I would have chosen differently. If I had felt an inkling of a warning in my head, surly I would not have sat on that swing!
Carol: It sounds like it was something I may have done myself. It sounds, again, like a beautiful and inviting setting.
Karyn: I thought that taking a moment to meditate on all the beautiful scenery surrounding me that day, in that country setting, would serve to help me unwind from all the stress I had been experiencing by running at top speed to accomplish my goals and timelines. Suddenly, I was thrown into a dither and the dominoes effect created a toppling of what had once been on my first priority list.
Carol: Aw, yes, choices…
Karyn: Often in our lives we make choices that we determine will be for our best good. Does anyone set out to really make choices that will cause them deep regret or remorse? Innocently, we begin to pursue a relationship that sadly turns out to be a dead-end; leaving our hearts stinging with sadness, regret and remorse. We may miss out on an opportunity that we thought perhaps best not to pursue; only to find out that the choice we reneged and left behind turned out to be the very thing that would have brought us unclaimed rewards and blessings.
Carol: How can the spirit of resiliency foster the sense of wisdom in times of mourning?
Karyn:
1. First, I determined that I would be “better than ever”, by reminding myself that there were blessings in disguise! Once, where I had taken my own brain for granted and all of its strengths and gifts, now I felt an insatiable desire to learn about the brain. Wisely, I began to study and gather articles and information and set out to teach ten classes on “The Joyful Brain: Mind Over Matter!”
2. Second, I began to realize that by choosing to turn the repercussions of my concussion into an opportunity to gain greater wisdom by studying about the infinite powers of our minds. I discovered the gift of “Neuroplasticity” and began to choose to become wiser by speaking to myself in more uplifting, positive and encouraging ways rather than to continue succumbing to my sad set of circumstances.
3. Third, I realized that knowledge does not benefit us unless we turn it into wiser choices and actions. My choice to become resilient, rather than to remain in a state of regret and to increase in my education about the infinite powers of my mind and brain was truly the wisest choice I could make in order to start setting back up all those dominoes (my life’s priorities) that began toppling over the moment I hit and injured my head.
4. Fourth, I chose to rise up over my sense of victimization by refusing to engage in anymore negative self-talk or self-pity about the consequences of my fall.
5. Fifth, I made a choice to refuse to entertain the spirit of regret and choose to make the best of my situation going forward. I determined to turn my weakness into my strength and set up a schedule for teaching my classes about cultivating a more joyful brain.
6. Sixth, I would become more resilient by encouraging others to retrain their minds and refrain their own regrets by teaching about “Mind Over Matter”. I would begin sharing with others the wisdom I am gleaning from my fall; as well as the education I am pursuing so that others might benefit from my newfound knowledge.
7. Seventh, I am cultivating through my choice to be resilient, an attitude of gratitude not necessarily for the bonk on my head, but for the awakening that fall provided me with so that I can praise God more about the genius He has blessed every single person with who has ever been born on this planet.
